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on the topic of being neurotic

I understand I'm being neurotic.

I have no reason/cause to be having the thoughts I am having. The only reason is that I'm allowing myself to have insecure/negative thoughts stemming yes partially from past relationship experiences.

I'm having some anxiety. And I've been avoiding writing about it or thinking about it, which is kind of unusual for the new'ish me.

I love my boyfriend. Yet, for some reason I've become fearful about us. I'm trying to pinpoint the why:
could it be because this is only my second serious relationship (ever)?
Or perhaps because it's the first serious relationship post divorce?
He's the first man who has supported me, and treated me with kindness and love? (Let's face it, I'm not used to being treated with respect....)

Bottom line is, I *know* I have nothing to fear.

I feel like I need to purge these thoughts rather than continue to let them stew in a back corner of my mind.

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